Chill My Bones
by percychased
Summary: Red; the colour of everything he was, and everything his family wasn't. Red, the colour of passion, fury and fire. / He loved her for years and years, and never got to tell her. / Sirius/Marlene. OS.


_This is my first time - ever - writing a Marauders-era fic. Usually I stick to Trio gen, so this is me, branching out. It's also the longest OS I've written, ever. _

* * *

The first time Sirius Black met Marlene McKinnon, she hadn't given him a second look. It was at breakfast in the Great Hall on their first day of their first year, and eleven-year-old Sirius had yelled across the Gryffindor table, saying "Oi! Girl! Pass the butter!" And she did, rolling her eyes and tossing the butter at him, before returning back to her conversation with another girl.

Sirius had later forgotten about the encounter; him and James were too caught up bothering Lily Evans, and teasing 'Snivellus' was just as fun as pranking him. Hogwarts was a whole new world, away from home. Much better than home, actually, and he should be enjoying it, right?

The second time Sirius Black had an encounter with Marlene McKinnon was in Transfiguration, and he remembered that class as clear as day years later; probably because it was one of the only times Sirius Black had ever been embarrassed.

James nudged him with his elbow. "Look, old Minnie's about to blow up on Pettigrew," he whispered, nodded towards the opposite end of the classroom. What James had said was true; McGonagall was turning a shade of purple, yelling at the small, quivering boy about 'improper conduct' and 'this was not how Gryffindor students behaved'. Pettigrew slunk lower in his chair, turning red from embarrassment.

Sirius snickered; if the boy couldn't even handle a glare from Lily Evans, he definitely couldn't handle McGonagall yelling her lungs out at him. "Have you every noticed," he asked James, in a low tone, "that whenever McGonagall deafens Pettigrew like that, she looks like that ogre picture you showed me?"

James let out a nervous laugh, not daring to look at Sirius; McGonagall had, apperently, heard them, and had pivoted around, marching over to the duo of troublemakers. "Lines, Black - it'll do you good to remember that calling your head of house an ogre does not get you house points."

He saw Marlene McKinnon raise her eyebrows at him from across the class, looking slightly amused. She shrugged in a 'what-can-you-do-about-it' sort of way, before returning back to her work. Sirius felt a small blush heat up his cheeks - wait, what?

His best mate was smirking at him knowingly, his hazel eyes flickering between his and Marlene. "Have fun with that," muttered James underneath his breath, as McGonagall marched back to her desk and ordered the rest of the class to get working.

The third time Sirius Black had an encounter with Marlene McKinnon was the one that made all of the difference.

It was their third year, a few weeks after Sirius' fourteenth birthday and a strong friendship between four boys had been formed. James, Sirius, Peter and Remus - the Marauders, they called themselves.

Binns seemed to drone on and on - how could Evans sit alert and attentative, Sirius couldn't fathom - and he had fallen into a half-asleep slumber, daydreaming about the next Gryffindor Quidditch cup.

Something had hit him in the head, jerking him out of his slumber and landing on his desk. Out of the corner of his eye, Marlene McKinnon nodded at him. Confused, Sirius picked up the crumpled piece of paper that hit him in the head.

He opened it and read the curly writing, not bothering to hide it - Binns didn't notice, anyway.

_Can you do me a favour?_ - Marlene.

He picked up his quill and wrote a response._ Depends what it is._ Sirius tossed it back at her, and she caught it easily, scanning his response with her eyes and writing one of her own before throwing it back at him.

_Wait for me outside of class, then._ Sirius shifted in his seat and turned around, nodding at her, before slipping the note into his pocket.

* * *

"Sorry 'bout that," said Marlene, tucking a blonde strand of hair behind her ear and grinning at him, revealing a straight set of white teeth.

Sirius blinked, momentarily distracted. "Er, it's okay," he said quickly, and internally cringed - why was he acting like this, confronted by Marlene's _perfect_ face and _perfect_ hair and _perfect_ teeth -

Oh, Merlin. James must've been right.

"Alice and I are making a bet," she explained, her blue eyes twinkling at him, "and I think Potter fancies Lily, and Alice thinks he doesn't. You're his best mate, you would know, wouldn't you?"

Usually he'd say "Good luck with that," with a flirtatious wink and walk away, but he found himself distracted with his newfound knowledge - James was right. Maybe he did fancy Marlene, just a little bit. He had hoped that those side glances during class and in the common room had gone unnoticed, but apparently not - James was extremely observant.

"Take a guess," he grinned, but his expression gave it away.

She smiled triumphantly. "I knew it!" Marlene jumped in excitement, before running down the corridor towards the Gryffindor common room and yelling, "Thanks, Black!"

* * *

"McKinnon, huh?"

"No."

"Yes - you fancy her, mate."

"No."

"You just don't want to admit that I'm right. Cause I am."

James was his closest friend, but sometimes that guy could be just so bloody irritating. "Fine, I do. But she doesn't fancy me back, so it doesn't really matter."

"Ah, but who said she doesn't fancy you back, huh?"

Sirius had no response, so James kept talking.

"She passed you a note in Transfiguration," James said.

"That was nothing."

"Sure it wasn't - you already told me all about what she asked you. McKinnon could've asked me herself, or Remus, or Peter - but she asked you, instead."

* * *

The wind blew his hair around the face, and it was these kind of times when he wished he didn't have hair that reached his shoulders.

"C'mon!" yelled James, mounting his broomstick and taking off towards the sky. Sirius followed closely after, swingly one foot over the slow, cracked school broom and following his best friend up in the air. Sirius flew towards the goalposts - he didn't play Keeper, or Quidditch at all, actually, but James had been so persistent when it came to practising Chaser that Sirius had gone out in this weather to fly with him.

"What the hell are you two doing out here?" called out an obviously feminine voice from behind him - through the fog, he hadn't seen anyone else on the pitch. It was Marlene, with her golden hair in a high ponytail, flying up to James and him.

"Practising, McKinnon," replied James, tossing the Quaffle up in the air, before racing forward, catching it, and shooting it through the far left hoop before Sirius had blinked.

"You could've gave me some notice, mate," Sirius grumbled, flying towards the Quaffle, which was sailing downwards. He caught it underneath his left arm, and returned it back to James.

"Mind if I join?" Marlene asked, hands on her hips. Sirius could tell it wasn't really a question; it was more like demanding to play with them.

"If you can catch up, McKinnon," said James, grinning wickedly at Sirius.

* * *

The next years flew by quickly, including the creation of the Marauders' Map and turning themselves in Animagi, which took months of dedication and complicated magic - the look on Moony's face, however was worth it.

He mostly avoided Marlene - Sirius always made himself into a fool around her. He dated other girls briefly; little flings that he always ended because he got bored. It was a bit mean, sure, but he was a warm-blooded teenage guy, and the girl he actually fancied - well, he didn't know if she actually liked him or not. Everyone in Gryffindor knew Marlene was very skilled at hiding her emotions, unlike a lot of others, who happened to wear their hearts on their sleeves, such as James. Things between him and Lily Evans had gotten nowhere; in fact, Sirius believed she hated him just a little bit more than before.

* * *

It was Christmas Eve of his seventh year when Sirius walked in on something he'd never forget.

"Prongs, you utter idiot, you forgot - " Sirius had casually strolled into a far corner of the library - truthfully, a place he didn't go often - with the Marauders Map tucked into his pocket. James had left it on a table in the common room, open for everyone to see. Luckily, no one saw, but...

"Oh!" Lily leapt back from James, blushing to the roots of her hair. Her red hair was everywhere, robes crinkled - she looked thoroughly snogged.

"So you two finally realized it, didn't you?" Giving them no chance to reply, he left the library, tossing the map at James, who looked rather pleased with himself.

* * *

"The Order of the Phoenix," said Dumbledore solemnly. Looking at the two boys, who sat still and quiet, he continued.

"A secret society dedicated to fighting against Voldemort and Death Eaters," Dumbledore explained, hands crossed and sitting behind his desk. Fawkes was perched behind him, a proud bird with red and gold feathers.

"I'm in," said Sirius immediately. James turned to him, eyes widened.

"Are you sure? I mean, this is big - "

"I'm doing the right thing. I'll do everything I can to help."

"I'm in too, then. I can't sit around and be useless. It's not going to be easy, but it's the right thing to do," said James, following Sirius' lead.

"Are you sure?" asked Dumbledore, peering at them over his half-moon glasses. "After this, there's no turning back. "

"Yes," replied the duo, in unison, getting up to leave. Just as they were at the door of Dumbledore's office, the Headmaster spoke once again.

"Tell Miss Evans, Miss McKinnon, Mr Lupin and Mr Pettigrew about this too, will you?"

* * *

Red and green bursts of light appeared all around him, lighting up the room like a Muggle fireworks show. The three Order members were in a triangle, with Sirius at the back, in the center and Marlene and Lupin ahead of him.

"Stupid half-breed," snickered a female voice - Bellatrix. Twisting her wand, she shot a spell at Remus, landing him flat on his back, struggling for breath. The pace of Sirius' heart sped up, but he continued duelling Rabastan. The man bared his teeth at Sirius, casting spell after spell, keeping him on his toes. Bellatrix walked up to Remus, glaring down at him.

"Poor little werewolf," she said, jabbing her wand at his nose painfully, making him cringe. Remus made to get up, but -

"Avada - "

"No!" screamed a hysterical voice. "Don't hurt my friend!" Marlene abandoned who she was duelling, and jumped in front of Remus, effectively blocking him from Bellatrix's path, who had a large, sucessful grin on her face.

"Kedavra!"

The triumphant cackle that followed would be branded in his mind for as long as he lived.

* * *

All Sirius could see was red. Red, the colour of blood and passion, the colour of bravery and courage. The colour that represented how he was different from what a Black was supposed to be. The colour of anger and fury. The colour of fire.

Everything reminded him of her. The sky, a brilliant blue, just like her twinkling eyes, the sun, just like her golden halo of hair.

"You gotta come in now, mate," murmured a low voice - James. A hand was clapped on his shoulders.

"Just a little bit longer," said Sirius, wrenching his shoulder out of James' grasp.

"I know what you're thinking, mate - regret. There's nothing you could have done." James blatantly told the truth, before disappearing, back inside Grimmauld Place.

Oh, but there was so many other things he regretted. Not telling the girl he loved that he loved her - so much. So much, that it was painful to think about. That he waited, years and years in silence.

He lay down in the snow, letting the coldness creep into him and chill his bones. He didn't know what he was doing - thinking, searching, waiting. Like an answer was just waiting to be discovered.

Sirius was waiting for a girl who would never come back.

* * *

_ For Camp Potter, Archery. Using the mandatory prompt and the optional prompt red._

_Also for the Marauders Era Challenge, using the pairing Sirius/Marlene and prompt broomsticks._

_Greenhouses Competition; rose, white. (The Blacks)._

_Gods and Goddesses Competition; Durga._

_Word count without A/N: 2,058._


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